Photography

Here are some of my favorite shots from recent times. Sorry, I don't have much to post, I'm pooped. We cleaned all day and I still have stuff to do.
Enjoy.

The Little Why's of Life

Why, after over 10 years with my lovely watch, did I have to go and lose it? I miss you watch, my wrist is lonely.

Why do I always keep the heel of the bread in the bag, even though I never use it. It just gets in the way of the "good" bread.

Why does my child when I give her a coloring book, make a mark on every single page instead of coloring on one page.

Why do I procrastinate? No really, why? Nevermind, I'll ask you later.

Why is it that the only reason I can remember a colleague's phone number is because it has the same last four digits as a high school boyfriend? But I can't remember my own telephone number from high school.

Why does everything happen at once? Why do multiple days keep attacking me at once and why does that far off date get here so fast?

Why are assumptions such a difficult thing to master and get rid of and why are we so disappointed when those assumptions are not met, even when we know they are assumptions and not reality?

Why aren't there more hours in a day? Would we waste those too on worthless things?

What Why's are you pondering today?

Blame it on the pregnancy or something

I missed a meeting this morning. With my boss. On a good day this is a bad thing. But due to my work at home status and the fact that my house is between my boss' house and the office, once a week, she stops by my house in the morning and we have a weekly meeting. I know, I know, I am truly blessed and have no reason to complain about anything ever.

Last week we canceled this particular meeting because I am in the middle of a huge project. The annual project which really continues to earn me my paycheck. Yes, I do other things throughout the year, but this particular project is the reason for my job title. Yada, yada. So this week I assumed (we all know all about that word) that we were not meeting again. la tee da.

So... where was I. Yes, I didn't sleep well last night, finally falling asleep on the couch about 6:00 after being up 4 or 5 times, only to be awoken 45 minutes later by the sound of a waterfall. I tried to ignore it. It sounded like the washing machine or dish washer. Couldn't be it. I finally figured out it through sleep stupor and process of illimination, the sprinklers. What I could not figure out what was it was so darn loud.

I finally got up to see what the noise was all about. I had left the window in the kitchen/dining area open and there happens to be a sprinkler head right there. Fabulous. I didn't bother checking for damage, I just closed the window and went back to bed.

All that to say, my darling hubby got up with the Boo Bear and fed her breakfast and I crawled out of bed at about 8:30. Poor me, I know. I threw on some gouchos, a long sleeve t-shirt, brushed my teeth (thankfully) and threw my hair in a poinytail. 15 minutes later right after hubby walked out the door, I was standing at the kitchen sink throwing up when I looked up to see my boss in the driveway.

I froze momentarily and then did the frantic, do I have time to put pants on/makeup/real clothes/shoes/anything!!!!! Nope, answer the door. On another tangent, because I cannot tell a story without them, the front foyer is never used for anything but toys, because we don't use the front door and it's the only place in the living room area for the toys. When the door bell rang, I began the foot sweep of trying to clear enough room to even get the door open at all.

I apologized profusely for my appearance, for the lack of unpreparation, for being a total loser and for assuming something I shouldn't have. She was very gracious, thank the Lord, and said no problem, we could talk about everything on the phone.

I feel like a dunce. I am a dunce. It's amazing they pay me at all.

Full Emmersion: Bigger than Words

There is something huge happening in my life this week. Very big to me. So big, even, it's bigger than I can really put into words.


I have tried to write about this all week and haven't been able to. Tomorrow I get Baptized. I am excited and happy for this day to finally be here. I am also nervous and anxious. My Dad and Stepmom will be there, my aunt will be there and a handful of friends. I cannot even begin to put into words the feelings I am having regarding tomorrow, but I hope after tomorrow to be able to tell you more.

World's most boring post... Ever

I got nothing. Nothing at all really.

Today consisted of:

• work
• child meltdown #1
• flu shot
• ouch
• child meltdown #2
• work
• work
• work
• work
• fold clothes
• work
• work
• dinner at Nana's
• child meltdown #3
• blog
• nighty night

Spinning

It's one of those days. I am trying to only focus on one day at a time, but I am failing miserably. I have a work deadline looming next Friday and I am faaareeaking out a little bit about getting it all done. On top of that, I am trying to stay on top of the house work and take care of my family all while continuing to do all the other little things that just pop up like doctor's appointments, etc.

I know that tomorrow will be a different day, but today, I feel like I am running full speed and not getting anywhere at all.

Pithy Post Title

I gots nothing. Nothing at all. So have some mundane randomness.

I was pre-registering at the hospital website for this baby to be born (no time soon please!) and just love it when I get to the questions about what I am going to be coming in for. For some reason the question, "Diagnosis?" seems silly to me in this particular instance. Um, pregnant?

There is a possibility that hubby and I might be getting to go on a real live, adult only vacation in the next month. I might just keel over and die if it happens. After the vacation of course. ;-)

Did I mention that my daughter can pick out her letters from A to E? I know, smart huh? Or maybe not, but I was pretty impressed. Her little voice is so cute, saying each letter. Technically she doesn't say E so much as when you point to E, she says, "Elmo."

And that's all for today folks!

The Faces of Motherhood

I do realize that I have been cheating the last couple of days. Just some mere quick words or photos to meet my obligation. I will try to do better. Promises, promises...

**********************************

Yesterday I met my parents half way between our two houses to exchange Boo Bear for a night of dates with my husband and quiet for me today. Not really so much for that as my parents begged to keep her for a night. Hubby and I got to spend a wonderful evening out together. We went to eat at a new Italian restaurant that was quite good. Service was mediocre, but the food and my good mood made up for that. Then, so as not to waste the time without child, we took a trip to Sam's to get diapers. But we took the time to stroll leisurely through the isles, holding hands and looking at things that are on our "Yeah, Right" Wish list. Things like 57" flat screen TV's and laptops. Okay, so the laptop is something we might actually get some day, but I don't see us ever buying a TV like that. We just don't watch enough TV to even warrant that kind of spend, and we have two perfectly good TV's as it is. We're simple people, with simple wants generally.

One thing I noticed when we got home was the silence. With child(ren) in the house, there is never true quiet. There is always an underlying current, a buzz of noise, and expectant feeling. Even when they are sleeping, we as parents are always poised to jump at a moments notice. No matter how long at a time they sleep, it is never truly quiet. I felt out of place, like something was missing (she was), listening to the quiet.

Today getting ready for Church and on the drive to Church I noticed it even more. No jabbering from the back seat. No one for me to talk to you. No turning around to see her expectant face, waiting for me to tell her what something is or acknowledge her when she says, "Cuck" (Truck) or "Caaaahhhs" (Cars) or my favorite, "pahl-puss" (school bus). No looking at her bouncing head and smiling face when Toby Mac's Burn for You comes on the radio. On the way home after eating a quiet, peaceful breakfast with my husband, I drove home in silence to a quiet house. As always when I have time without my daughter, I have trouble deciding what to do first. Do I clean, do I run errands, do I relax? What to do, what to do?

So, what did I do? I cleaned the kitchen, swept and mopped the disgusting floors and I am now chilling. Ahhh...

Your turn: What do you do when the kids are gone?

What's all the Buzz About

Token Halloween shot, 4 days late. She has three different costumes. Here are two. The Texas Cheerleader outfit really isn't a costume so much as a way of life. Hook Em!

Go Horns!
Buzzzzzzzz!

What was that I said about posting all month?

Yeah, that! It's only November 1st and already I have writer's block... We went to church last night so I don't even have any cute token Halloween pictures to post. That would have been easy. So, I guess I will just have share these other cute shots of Boo Bear and I did finally take a tummy shot. Here you go, my first post of NaBloPoMo. Exciting, huh?

My little cutie!

Her latest "trick," surprised face.

And the token belly shot, 20 weeks. Hello Bellybean.
Sorry it's fuzzy, the counter just wouldn't hold still.

The Joys of Parenthood

These days I find myself spewing words that I never thought I would say for any reason before I had children.

Things like these gems have flown from my mouth recently.

"Get your hands out of your pants." Said as she has her hand down the back of her diaper. Don't go there!

"Would you like for me to wrap up teddy in the blanket?" Said when she plopped a huge teddy bear and a blanket in my lap and walked away.

"Quit licking the grocery cart."

"Get off the floor!!!" Said as she wipes her entire body across the floor (which of course is not clean!) She does this everywhere, the grocery store, someone else's house, outside.

Oh the joys.

We had a little bit of a scare last night. As I was getting gas on my way to my Grandmother-in-laws' for dinner, my MIL noticed that Boo Bear's top right two teeth looked odd. I climbed in the car to get a better peek. Sure enough, the gum looked like it was swollen and was covering almost completely her top middle tooth and the one to the right of that. I tried scraping at it gently thinking it might just be food or something. Nothing came off. I was a little worried, but said I would wait until I had a chance to brush her teeth. We got to dinner and I caught a glimpse of her teeth again and it really had me worried.

I'm going through all her recent tumbles trying to remember if she hit her mouth. I can't remember one in which this happened. I am going through the scenerios of dead teeth and all that that might mean. I am trying to not freak out and not think of the fact that we have no dental insurance, that we are still paying off a large amount of ER bills (2 visits) and trying to just trust that it is all in God's hands and that nothing is the end of the world when it comes to teeth.

I was doing pretty good until hubby got there and he took a look and was horrified. We looked up at the roof of her mouth and that was gray too. It was really scary looking, yet we could not figure out how in the world she could have hit her mouth that hard and had us not notice. I was having a serious case of Mommy Guilt. "Do I brush her teeth enough? Should I brush them more? Do I give her too much juice? How could I not notice if she killed her teeth?"

We ate dinner after praying that God would somehow heal her teeth. After hubby was laying on the floor playing with Boo Bear. All of a sudden he points at Boo Bear and yells, "It's all gone!" We are all looking at him like he is crazy. "What's gone?" I ask. "Her teeth are fixed." Sure enough!! We looked again and her teeth were fine. I guess it was food after all. I had given her grapes as a snack before dinner at our house and somehow a skin had managed to seriously attach itself to her teeth and the roof of her mouth in such a way that it looked like her two top right teeth were dead. Talk about answered prayer!!! Praise God that it was nothing serious! We had a good laugh over it for sure.

What's in a name?

I'm a slacker. Consider this yesterday's post.

We are slowly beginning the process of trying to find a suitable girl's name for this baby, if it turns out to be a girl. And that is where you come in. You being my two or three avid readers. Feel free to take a poll among your family and friends. We would like something that is not mainstream. I don't want her to have 3 other hers in all her classes. Unique yet not too weird. Needs to go with our last name which I am not going to share with you all so you will just have to use your imagination and hope that it works.



What girl's names do you like?

The one in which I over commit myself yet again

Heard that story before? Since I am so consistent with posting and all, I thought (this could be questioned), what better thing to do than to sign up for NaBloPoMo? I am nothing if not an overachiever and under deliverer. Hee hee.

My hope is that this little motivation might encourage me to actually post. This poor second child already is getting a bad dose of the second child syndrome and I would like to chronicle at least a little bit of his/her journey. There has not been a single belly shot taken. Not one. Oh, and there is belly to behold. More to be held than I would like.

I do have one of these shots though. Enjoy.

He/She looks like the Daddy, as usual. If you took a picture of him with an x-ray machine I suppose. And he/she is quite the mover and shaker. It took the tech an hour to take measurements because he/she would not be still at all. Next to labor, the big ultrasound is the worst part of pregnancy for me. For those of you that have been through it, well you know the drill. For those that haven't, they make you drink 32 oz of water an hour (give or take an hour - whenever they get around to you) and then don't let you "relieve" yourself until after the ultrasound. I really didn't think I was going to make it through this experience and other "guests" waiting in the hall thought I was going into labor right then. I was, with 32 oz of water.

All that to say, all looks good, baby is still on the go and I am starting to feel the Bellybean move around. Life moves along at a steady clip and one day runs into the next, but life is good.

So, what's new with you?

Pimping myself for a new Blog Template

Because I am just that desparate. Ever since the designer not to be named removed my photobucket images from existence and my Where The Wild Things Are template died a slow death, I have been wanting a new design. I have admired her work for awhile and happened to be there today and saw this.

So, here's my entry. Hope this qualifies for posting the logo and and hopefully giving her some business. Give a fellow Mom some bidness!

The Epitome of Faith

I cannot begin to fathom what this family has gone through in the last couple of weeks, months, etc. But I can tell you that their faith through it all has been so encouraging to me. Before you click that link, beware, there will be tears. It is a very sad story, but a very uplifting one as well.

I cannot do the story justice, but the short version is that their second daughter had Trisomy 18 (you can click on a link on their blog to get more information on this) and originally they were told she would probably not make it to birth. Not only did she make it to birth, she lived 8 days, which is rare as they usually only give children with Trisomy 18 a couple of hours after birth.

If you can make it through, I would encourage you to read through the posts of the last month or so. The faith this couple has in the Lord has opened my eyes to what true, unabiding faith truly is. Incredible -- truly awe inspiring to me.

Am I who I want to be...

Listening to the radio in the car yesterday, there was a promo commercial for a concert coming up featuring Switchfoot. They played a snippet of the song This Is Your Life and it really got me thinking. The portion they played says, "This is your life, are you who you want to be?" Am I who I want to be? The short answer is no, no I am not. What's funny about that, is that for the first time in my life, that doesn't make me uncomfortable. For the first time that answer doesn't make me depressed and question who I am, but gives me hope, something to look forward to. I would like to think that I am better today than I was yesterday, but that is not always the case. Some days, I am the same as yesterday.

On a day to day basis, I do the best I can at being a Mother, a Wife, an employee, a friend, a daughter, a Christian. But multi-tasking is a blessing and a curse and if I really look closely, each of these personas only get about a 10% effort in a day in order to make up the total percentage of who I have to be each day. I want to be a better everything/everyone and I want to strive to reach that goal each and every day. But sometimes we get lost in the minutinae of the day and forget the bigger picture. In my attempt to try and finish a project for work, I ignore my daughter's pleas to go outside. In my attempt to rest at the end of the day, I don't cook dinner for my family like I should. In my attempt to find myself, I ignore my duties as a daughter or as a friend. In my selfishness, I choose to sleep instead of spend time with the Lord. And at the end of each day, I pray that tomorrow I can do better. Sometimes this may mean cutting something out, because somedays it just isn't possible to do it all. But really, at the end of the day, what you got done, is what you got done and is the world really going to end because there are dishes in the sink? The things that must get done have ways of rising to the top of our priority list, but sometimes our priorities are out of whack. Sometimes we needed to be reminded of the bigger picture.

Through out my life I have had many trials and I didn't always handle them well when I was in the midst of them, but my viewpoint on trials has changed recently. You see, if you think about it, we learn the most and grow the most when we go through trials. When living in the status quo, we don't learn big lessons, we don't grow our characters, we remain simply in the status quo. The status quo is comfortable, but if we live in it always, we aren't really living are we? If life is great, and everything is going along at an even pace, with no bumps in the road, we don't strive to be better, we don't strive to learn or grow. Think about when you fail at something. Do you analyze what went wrong? Do you learn from your mistakes? Do you change your actions in order to get different reactions in similar situations? The answers to all these questions, I hope, is yes. We analyze what went wrong when we fail. We learn, we grow. But, when we succeed, we generally as a rule, don't analyze what we did to figure out why we succeeded. We are too busy basking in the glory of our success. But did we really learn anything other than success feels good? Maybe on a occasion, but generally, we move on to the next big thing. So why is it so hard to look forward to trials, to want trials in order to learn and grow? Why is it so hard to try and see the bigger picture when we are in a trial? Why is it so hard to stop in the midst of a trial and ask ourselves, "What could God be trying to teach me? How is He trying to grow me?"

Since becoming a Christian, I am constantly wondering what God has in store for me. Knowing that God is my strength in times of trial, I am not so scared of what's to come. I wonder what trials He has in store for me, in order to help me grow and learn and become more like Christ.

James 1:2-3 "2Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance."

This is your life. Are YOU who you want to be?

Raising a Shoe Maven

Boo Bear is obsessed with shoes. First thing in the morning generally, she wants her shoes on, right that minute. Part of her obsession is that she associates shoes with outside and she loves outside. But I don't think that explains why she constantly picks other peoples shoes up, even in the doctor's office waiting room if they will let her take them off their feet, which, ewwww. If my shoes are laying around, which they always are, because I hate wearing shoes unless absolutely necessary, she is constantly bringing them to me, throwing them down and giving me the "put them on" look.

Just now I looked down and was so proud to see she got one shoe on the right foot and in the right direction all by herself. Then I realized she had the other shoe on completely backwards. How it was staying on her foot, I have no idea. Now she has both on the right feet. The straps aren't on, but she is working on that. Now if I can get her to go pee pee in the potty, we might be ready for The Bellybean when he/she arrives.

Freezer's full

I've always been able to tell how healthy I am eating by how full the freezer is and how empty the fruit bowl is or vice versa. This pregnancy is doing a number on my eating habits. Not to say I am the most healthy eater in the world. That would be a lie. I like fried food more than anything else in the world. Well, maybe not the world. But if it's fried, I like, excluding weird bugs and such.

My poor husband has got to be about sick of asking what's for dinner and hearing, "whatever you can find." I have mastered the art of the YOYOTM dinner. That's short for, Your Own Your Own. Right now I am sick of eating. I am starving all the time, yet nothing sounds good, nothing looks good, nothing tastes good, nothing sits good. And yet, I am forced to eat constantly. I am sick of eating or dealing with food. I do better if I don't have to be the one to fix the food. Seeing as I have to fix food for another human being at least 6 times a day, that makes fixing a meal at the end of the day almost impossible. Boo Bear likes that to eat that child. But not always what I fix her the first time, or the second for that matter. So by the time hubby gets home at 8 or so, he's on his own usually.

I have been trying to buy already made casseroles or stuffed chicken or something from the meat market or the freezer isle, but even when I cook that stuff, I sit down to eat and end up pushing it away. Needless to say, we have been throwing away way more food than we should and I feel so guilty every time I fill the trash can with completely edible food. Hubby forgets to take stuff for lunch and I'm lucky if I can eat something once much less twice.

Lately I have been buying more junk food than I can remember buying since college or at least since I was a single person who always ate on the go. We don't normally have snack type food in our house. Hubby constantly complains that there is nothing to snack on, at least nothing worth snacking on. Lately the pantry has seen the likes of chips, and not just one kind, but up to three or four different kinds. And things like pudding. I didn't even grow up eating pudding. And the fridge has seen things like ranch dip in a jar and cookie dough and the like. I know, crazzzzyyy, but for us it is.

Funny thing is, I crave fruit the most, but find it hard to get good fruit in all the different types. for example, today I tried to buy fruit. Lots of it. I tried to find pineapple because I had some in a fruit salad this week and now I WANT MORE! No dice. Slim pickin's. I tried to buy grapes. I could only find the purple, with seed variety. No dice with a toddler and me for that matter. I tried to buy peaches. They looked awful. I bought oranges last week and they were nasty. I bought some pears, which having already sampled are hard as rocks, some bananas, but the girl has a hold on all those and one grapefuit, because it looked good at the time. I limited myself to one because who knows if 1) it will be any good and 2) if I will want one tomorrow.

A sampling of the other things I bought today: (Poor hubby) I have * the things we do not normally eat in this house.

• Lean Pockets*
• cookie dough* (on occassion I will buy this. Hubby eats it generally in about two sittings)
• Lime Tortilla Chips
• Cheetos
• 2 packs of bagels* (This is the one thing I have been able to consistently eat lately. Must because I love cream cheese.)
• Chicken Salad* (this is another one of those things I have all of a sudden gotten a taste/craving for; that and the thought of lunch meat makes me want to hurl, but you run out of things to feed a toddler for lunch when you don't have any leftovers)
• Yogurt
• Milk
• eggs (I am having trouble getting protein so I have taken to hard boiled eggs)
• Chewy granola bars*
• Refried Beans*
• Steak Quesadilla Rolls*
• Egg Rolls*

Sound like nutrition central to me, don't you agree?

Amazingly at my check up last week, I haven't gained a pound. Now don't shoot me... I wish I could eat. I so long for food to taste good, look good, smell good. Anything. But, alas, I get up each morning and force myself to eat something, anything. And then wait to see if I will cough it up. It's a joy really. There is nothing quite like puking your guts out while your 20 months old "pats" you on the back. And by "pats" I mean, trying to pound out what I ate yesterday.

She's a doll really. I'll use that as a segway. The girl will be 20 months this Saturday. My how the time flies when you are... chasing a toddler. She runs everywhere, in that stinted sort of way that makes you cringe thinking they are going to bite the dust at any moment. She never stops unless she is watching "Melmo" or this, which she will watch over and over and over and over, until my ears start to bleed and I wake up in the morning singing these songs.

(right now she is in her crib babbling, "miinnne" over and over. As far as I know, she doesn't know that word. We don't use it in this house, but I imagine some of those children in the church toddler room know it and love it.)

She loves bubbles and eating and playing on the couch. She loves "outsiiiiie" more than life itself and unfortunately for her, being outside makes mommy sick. See we live in the armpit of HOT, south Texas where it may only be 86 degrees (my foot), but with 97% humidity, it always feels like your face is going to fall off. In my current condition, any additional reason for me to be uncomfortable is something I try to avoid. But the girl, she wants to be "outsiiiiiiieeee" right now. She has started to be able to open doors in the last day or two and can now open the door to the laundry room which leads to the back door which is the door we use 99% of the time. She can't unlock and open that one (yet!!!!!), but it gets her close enough to the door to drive me crazy with the "outsiiiiiiiiieeeeeee."

Tangent.... I'm not a girly girl by any stretch of the imagination, but I hate being outside, unless it is a)spring or b)fall, both of which make up about a whopping 3 whole weeks here in south Texas. So needless to say, I hate being outside. It's hot, it's sticky, there are bugs out there and spiders and snakes and such. We have wasps and bees all over the place and I don't like things that bite or sting. Aside from the obvious that bites and stings hurt and such, I am also allergic to the entire world. I swell up like hives at the slightest bite by an ant or a mosquito and in case you haven't heard, mosquitos like it down here in Texas. Might have something to do with all that darn water in the air. I've been stung once in my life by a yellow jacket and my ankle swelled up 3 times it's normal size, so needless to say, I try to avoid this situation. Then we have spiders and to me a spider is a spider, I'm not getting close enough to figure out if you can kill me or not. I'm also allergic to mold, grass, pollen, trees, the air, anything that moves, etc. So galavanting through the grass as Boo Bear loves to do, is not as pleasant for me as it is for her.

End tangent.

I try to suffer a little each day to take the girl outside. Somedays that means a trip to the mail box and across the street to see the neighbors dog. Other days it includes a walk to the end of the block and back. Some days she really gets a treat and we spend a whole hour out there. But the real treat is when daddy is home. She associated daddy with outside because he always takes her outside. When daddy is home, the minute she sees him, she wants her "shoooooooooooouse" and then she runs for the door. It doesn't matter is he just got her out of her crib in the morning, she will point to her shoes and demand that she get them on. That girl is a shoe maven. She loves them shoes. She even wants me to wear shoes all the time, although I suspect it has more to do with going outside than it does her really wanting me to wear shoes. She will pick up my shoes and find me and plop them down in front of me with a look on her face that clearly says, "Shoes. Put them on. Now." She does try to cram them on my feet for me, but now has learned it's easier to just give me the look. I've tried explaining to her that Mommy hates wearing shoes about as much as she hates going outside, but she ain't buying it.

Well this turned into a longer post than I meant for it to, but hey, at least I updated and told you something besides, blah, blah, blah, or maybe this is just more blah, blah, blah. Well, blah, so there.

A doozy of a whoozy

Why is it that every 3-4 months blogrolling decides to work the way it says it does and actually list your blogs in the most updated order? Just curious.

Since my last post, life has gotten even more exciting. Can you believe it? On Wednesday, shortly after I hit publish on that glorious post, Boo Bear woke up from her nap with a fever of 103.7. Fabulous. Thanks be to God that hubby was able to come home from work early so that I could go to church for Word of Life. Boo Bear has been running anywhere from 99 to 103.7 since then and on Friday we finally broke down and went to the doc. There ensued much screaming, crying and whimpering. A blood test and urine bag, oh the joys, and 3 hours later, we have a diagnosis. Viral. I hate that word, viral. It seems to me, (I am by no means a doctor), that viral is the term for, "random illness that makes your life miserable." Until yesterday, Boo Bear showed no symptoms at all other than the fever, so that was good. The Virus did entail rearranging my work schedule on Saturday, the one day out of the entire year I was supposed to go into the office from 8-5. Hubby stayed home in the morning and I came home at noon to take over.

Did I fail to mention, I woke up Friday with a cold. Bonus for me.

Boo Bear woke up from her nap yesterday with her now typical fever as well as a puffy chin and cheeks. Small cause for concern, but nothing major. The doc mentioned she looked a little swollen on Friday. That didn't stop me from Googling "puffy face in toddler" which came up with Mumps. Small freak out. Then I noticed a rash around her ears. Googled that. Mumps, measles, rubella. Much larger freak out. Called my sister, who promptly told me to stop Googling stuff and step away from the computer. I did finally call the doctor's after hours number, which ended with us going to the ER once again. Why, why, why do children only get sick on the weekends? I despise the ER, as I'm sure most people do. Boo Bear always manafests some weird symptoms at precisely 5:01 PM on a Friday or something, almost ensuring us a trip to the ER. Most likely because of liability issues they always tell us to go, but since I am a first time Mom, I tend to lean towards the "better safe than sorry" and "what if it is something horrible and I don't take her" side of things.

So 3.5 hours later, sure enough, just viral, similar to Roseola, should start breaking fever now that rash is spreading across her face and all over her torso. She did however manager to get an ear infection between the time we went to the doc on Friday and Saturday night at 11:30. then it took us almost half the time in the ER to just get the prescription written and filled. When I walked up to the counter at the 24 hour pharmacy, the guy told me 30 minutes. 30 minutes!!! It's midnight on a Saturday night, you've got to be kidding me! So we went and did what any normal people would do, we went and got a Frosty and french fries. We got home around 12:30 or so and Boo Bear and I crashed. Hubby stayed up because he is weird like that. Really he just needs time to wind down.

Today we both feel like crap and are trying to balance each other out. We have watched the same silly baby song video 3 times and I've had about all I can stand. 2.5 hours until bedtime and counting!!!!

Hope your weekend is going better than mine! Tell me something fabulous, great, or a juicy secret. I'm grasping at straws here!

The best laid plans

Should that be "layed"??? Anyways... I woke up this morning thinking of the day's to do list as I usually do. My list was longer today than most days, so I lay there trying to figure out how to get it all done and not fall over from exhaustion. I prayed that God would allow me to get done the things that were necessary and allow me to let go of the things that were not.

Here is what my list looked like as I lay in bed at 8:30 this morning. (yes, I know, I am blessed with a late sleeper)

• Shower
• Run to store to pick up one item
• Make muffins for baby shower to take to church tonight since I won't be able to make the shower on Saturday. (note: my original plan was to make scones. Made scones last night. Came out badly. New plan: muffins)
• Work 5 hours
• Entertain child
• Church by 5:30 to eat and feed child so that I am ready to begin WOL (youth program) at 6:10
• Youth Program from 6:10 until 8:10
• meet with Paster at 8:30
• Come home and fall into bed

As I got up, I realized a couple of things that needed to be added to the list. Like change the sheets that haven't been changed in.... Nevermind. In order to change the sheets, I had to a) dump clothes out of basket onto stripped bed to fold at a later time b) take clothes out of dryer and put into now emptied basket c) treat pair of shorts from yesterday that Boo Bear got Squash all over.

With that done, we resumed the breakfast ritual. What to give Boo Bear for breakfast. We started with Pear and some milk while I figured out the next step also while trying to calm my stomach and figure out what the Bellybean might like to eat this morning. Try some pear.

Hear crash. Boo Bear has figured out accidently how to remove her tray from her high chair resulting in milk all over floor.

• Add to list, impromptu mopping of floor.

Lest anyone confuse me with a housekeeper, note I only cleaned the area with spilled milk. What? I'm on a tight schedule.

Give Boo Bear some yogurt, let her feed herself. I feed myself some mandarin oranges and some pear, wash down with OJ. Return to scene of the yogurt massacre to dig remnants out of bottom of container and wash down child.

Log on to network and check email for work. Return to kitchen to clean up remaining dishes from breakfast and try to find something else to eat for myself. Cough once. Run to bathroom and relieve myself of all earlier food while having Boo Bear look over my shoulder and bang me on the back.

• Impromptu throwing up. Check!

Return to kitchen where Boo Bear climbs back into her high chair and says "eat!" Feed her some more fruit. Look for something new to put in my stomach. Sit down to work for an hour or so.

Change diaper. Pee Yew stinky! Bonus.

Walk Boo Bear across street to see neighbor's dog. Not there. Walk back. Check mail from yesterday. Load Boo Bear in car to head to store. Decide to stop by MIL's to see if she has the item I need. Thank you God for small favors. No trip to store.

Return home. High Chair. "Eat!" Attempt to feed leftover chicken nuggets from dinner last night. Child eats four bites. "dooooone!" Great. Make muffins. Mess up recipe as usual. Still works. Get muffins in oven.

Make sandwhich for self. Boo Bear insists on eating it with me. So much for "dooooone!" Work. Work. Work. Work.

Take muffins out of oven to cool. Feed Boo Bear again. Change diaper.

Work.

Put Boo Bear down for nap. Work. Work. Work.

Put finishing touches on muffins.

Find something else to eat. Work. Work. Work.

Pack muffins up and try to keep them airtight so that they will last until Saturday for Shower. Know glass container of cinammon over in the process.

• Impromtu sweeping of floor and vacumming of floor to get glass and large amounts of cinnammon off of white tile floor and out of the cracks between tile. Bonus.

Return to work.

Type this post. As of posting this it is 3:18 CST and I have to shower and finish my day. My kitchen is a wreck and I'm exhausted already. So much for my to do list. Hope your list is going better than mine.

The Car

The Damage: $4600
The Pain: Bad

The Title

I tried to come up with a title, but since this is once again an update of what is happening, there really isn't much to describe it other than everyday life. I love reading other people's blogs and I know that my life has interesting moments, but at the end of the day, when I try and think of something to write, all I can think is, "It's all so normal." And I'm not a good enough writer to turn nothing into something. Hence my lack of posting lately.

That and I'm just plum tired all the dang time. With the first baby, I had to work full time, and I don't know how I did that, but at least I could come home and go to sleep for a little bit and I only had to worry about feeding myself and hubby if he was lucky. With this second baby though, boy golly is it different. I work part time from home in a "career job" and full time at home as a mom and wife. Needless to say, my full time job is suffering a little bit. Don't worry, Boo Bear isn't starving or anything, but hubby might be a little bit. I nap when Boo Bear naps, which does put some strain on my working hours as I usually get most of my work done while she naps. But I'm so dang tired!

Also with this second pregnancy I am noticing side effects that I didn't have with Boo Bear. Things like the, TMI, constipation and my mouth feeling dirty all the time. I am not by habit a very good brusher, sometimes forgetting to brush before bed, but lately I have been brushing all the time because it feels like bacteria ick is growing in my mouth at an alarming rate. My back is also killing me. I guess carrying around a 25 pound child doesn't help that. The doc said to cut back on carrying her around. At least she realizes that not picking her up at all is really not an option. It drives me crazy when doctors tell you to do things that just aren't possible. I am so blessed with my OB. She really is a good, people doctore and I would refer anyone to her.

In other fun news, we spent every night since Wednesday at the Church for a conference, learning about the One Anothers, how to treat those we come in contact with. As a baby Christian, I am constanstly convicted by what I hear at Church. Where as before I couldn't stand to go to Church, now I can't get enough of being around likeminded people and hearing God's Word.

With that said, I have to be thankful for all that we do have as my hubby had to take my car in today. Looks like it may be something transmission related which means something that will break our checking account or put us further into debt. But, alas, at least we have a car and at least we have the means to get it fixed.

Boo Bear is growing like a weed, both physically and intellectually. She has so many tricks that her father and I exploit, it really is kind of sad. She has gotten so that she will do them all in a row now if we ask her to do one. She will show us her muscles, which is a the flexing of her arms with an accompanying grunt. She will then do Serious Face, which involves looking down while frowning and rolling her eyes up in her head. And now her new one is Cookie Monster. Daddy asked her one day what Cookie Monster says while watching Sesame Street and she says in a gruff voice, argh, argh, argh, argh. It is too funny and I will try and capture them on film so that I can share the cuteness with you (You being my two readers that are left. I thank you for checking in).

Well, that's about all I can update right now. May your life be filled with normal things like mine, but humor, fun and laughter as well.

The Interview

Becky was interviewed by Becky and then offered to interview readers of her site, so here is my interview with the fabulous Becky.

She has got some great questions that one!

1. The Leap of Faith: This may be way to involved to go into here, but why the leap of faith? Was this is a slow journey or was this an "aha moment"?

Well, I guess this will be the short version of my testimony. This is still going to be quite long though, but I would love to share my journey and thank you Becky for asking.

Growing up I had very little religion in my life until I moved to live with my Dad and Stepmom in 5th grade. They are both Jewish and so it only made sense that I would attend Hebrew School. I got Bat Mitzvah'd when I was 13 and continued attending Hebrew School until I graduated from high school. Although I was going to religious school every week, I did not have a relationship with God. Through out most of high school and college, I considered myself agnostic or an atheist, flipping back and forth between the two, which ever one sounded good at the time.

One day in college, I was walking through campus on my way to find out if I had passed a class. I stopped on the East Mall by the Tower and looked up and said to myself, “Please, God, just let me pass this class.” Nothing too profound there, but in that instant it became clear to me for the first time in my life that I believed there was a God. Why else would I be talking to him?

Now that I knew that I believed in God, I did little to pursue what that meant or to further my relationship with Him. I went along living my life the way I thought was best, with little regard to what place God had in my life. During these years, I would argue with Christians about the Bible and its validity. I argued that it was just a history book. That Jesus was just a really great man, but not the Messiah. I mistakenly thought that the Old Testament was the Torah and the New Testament was the Bible. I didn’t know that the Old Testament was actually more than just Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus, Numbers and Deuteronomy. I didn’t know that the Bible included the Old Testament and the New Testament, I thought it was just the New Testament. I argued against all that the Bible stood for, without knowing anything at all about it. I was naïve and stupid to argue against something I knew nothing about, I just never argued it to anyone who really knew much about it either, so I was never really challenged about my beliefs. A lawyer doesn’t go into court without studying all the facts, yet for years I had been walking into court blind so to speak without having ever read the Bible, yet arguing against it.

When I first met my husband, I did not know anything about his religious beliefs until one day he told me that he was finding his faith again. He was not a Christian when I met him although that was his background, but it didn’t mean anything to him at that time. As we dated, he grew in his faith and was led to start reading the Bible more often. When we got married, we knew that our religious differences would be a difficult part of our marriage. We thought love would be enough to get us through those difficult times. In the past three years we have argued more over religion than anything else. When I got pregnant with Boo Bear our arguments increased because I grew worried about how we would raise our child (as did he). I worried about the view point of Christians and how we would separate his viewpoint and mine.

During my pregnancy, my friend Tami lost her baby at 38 weeks and for the first time in my life the only thing I knew to do was to pray. I relied on God to help me with this difficult time and somehow I made it through my pregnancy without worrying more than any other mother that something horrible would happen to my baby. The death of Ethan caused me to rely on God like I never had before. Because Tami was a Christian and I wanted to help her grieve, I asked for Bible verses and Biblical advice that might help her in regards to what she was going through. Watching Tami go through such a horrible experience and come out the other side still loving and glorifying God and thanking Him for this experience in her life was a huge testament to the power of her faith.

From that point forward, I prayed more often and consciously tried to quit swearing, mainly because I know it isn't Godly and partly because I don't want my children ever saying those words. I had a relationship with God, but still felt it wasn't as complete as it needed to be.

To keep this story short, over the last two years, I have tried doing Bible Study, I have attended Church on occasion, I have tried reading the Bible with my husband and on my own. I went through periods where I did nothing to further my faith. I went through periods where I wanted nothing to do with the Bible and nothing to do with religion, when I though I had a good relationship with God.

For about 6 months to a year now I have been praying for God to show me the truth in regards to my beliefs, whatever the truth was. If that meant that I would become a Christian, then so be it. I put it in God’s hands and trusted Him enough to lead me where He wanted me to be. As I mentioned above, I did Bible Study for a little while, answering the questions “correctly”, but not really getting the whole truth out of what I was reading. When I truly let go and let God take over, that is when reading the Bible changed for me. I all of a sudden saw things clearly. Things that I had read before, but gotten nothing out of, now impacted me greatly.

About 3 months ago I decided to go to Church with hubby one week. I don’t know why this week was any different than any other week, but I felt led to go. At Church they mentioned a ladies Bible Study that was coming up for the summer. I later mentioned to hubby that I thought I might like to go. These things came out of my mouth without me thinking about them really or realizing what I was doing.

I started ladies Bible Study at the beginning of June and have gone every Friday but one since then. We are reading a book called Idols of the Heart that helps us to see the idols that we make for ourselves and the things we worship other than God. It has been a great way for me to connect with other women who struggle with the same things I struggle with.

At the same time, I started going to Church every Wednesday evening with hubby. Where as before, the Pastor would rub me the wrong way with his preaching, now I was learning from it. It was touching my heart and teaching me things. I was then asked to volunteer at Vacation Bible School. This was a wonderful opportunity for me to learn along with the kids the story of Jonah and the whale. I learned more than the kids I think.

Then I decided I would start going on Sunday mornings as well as Wednesdays. So now I was going to Church Wednesday nights, Friday mornings for Bible Study and Sundays. Before, I never wanted to go to Church because it took up my free time. Before, the words sinner, unbeliever, and saved made my skin crawl. All of a sudden, my heart had been changed and it can only be attributed to the Holy Spirit working in my heart to show me the truth. I know that sounds far fetched, but it is the only way I can explain it. All of those decisions regarding going to Church were made without thought, without intent, without hubby pushing or encouraging me. Nothing in my life had changed, yet everything in my life had changed.

Before I became a believer, I had many misconceptions about Christianity. I thought that Christians were zealots, overly strict, stifled by the rules of some “book.” What I have found about being a Christian is that it is the most freeing experience I have ever had. I have had such peace in my life since June 20th when I became a believer. I know that my life will not always be easy, but I can always be thankful for what happens because I know that God has a plan for me and that His plan is good.

This journey essentially has taken me my whole life and I think will continue through out the rest of my life. If anyone is interested in reading my whole testimony (20 pages), I would be happy to share it with you. Email me at shootersstation (at) gmail (dot) com. You know the drill.

2. Motherhood x 2: Planned? What is your initial thinking (boy vs girl)? Is this the beginnings of your own football team or will this complete the family?
Yes, this second pregnancy was planned, as much as one can plan these things. It took a small leap of faith on my part as some days I barely make it through the day with one, but I knew I wanted another child. TMI ahead... I had trouble regulating after breastfeeding and so instead of switching from one pill to another and then getting off altogether in a couple of months, we just decided to stay off and let God decide when our next child would come.

Boy vs. girl? Well, we are of the camp that doesn't find out what is in the womb until the birth day. With Savannah, we were sure we were having a boy and you see that got us a girl. I would love a little boy, but will be happy with whatever God blesses us with. Hubby wants as many kids as we can have, but I think that 3 is probably my limit. I tell hubby that if he can figure out a way to carry and have the kids, we can have as many as he wants. 4 is a possibility, but I just can't see how we would afford that many children. We will have to see where the Lord leads us.

3. Getting away: Mountains, lake, ocean, desert....heat or cold.... where do you prefer to go when you want to get away?
I'm a beach girl. I like warm weather, tropical settings preferred. Although I generally hate being hot, when I'm on vacation, it's a whole different ball game. We honeymooned in Costa Rica and I would love to return there as well as visit Hawaii, Australia, New Zealand, any of the islands in the Caribbean. Who am I kidding? I would love to go anywhere. We haven't had a real vacation since I was 7 months pregnant with Boo Bear and before that it was our honeymoon.

4. All about you: What would the title of your autobiography be? When will it be written (now vs. when you are retired)? Will you talk about the adventures of your youth, the discoveries of your adult life, all of the above?
That's a tough one. Despite writing on this here blog for the whole world to see, I don't know if I could write a coherent book about my life. I think it would definitely have to wait until I retire so that I could really focus on the book. I would include my entire life, the adventures of childhood, the craziness of college, the growing as a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend. I have been told I have lived a pretty interesting life, sometimes hard, sometimes wonderful, but always mine. In fact, that sounds like a good title for an autobiography, Life: Always Mine.

5. Looking glass: You seem to have a passion for photography. When did this start? Do you see something as beautiful and want to capture it or do you see it differently through a lens?

I don't know when my passion for photography started. I have always enjoyed taking pictures, but didn't really show an aptitude for it until about 5 or 6 years ago. I would love to learn more about photography, maybe even go to school and become a professional photographer. But alas, my job right now is to raise my children. Maybe someday.

I usually see something with my naked eye and want to shoot it. My skills are not such that I can make the photo fully reflect what it is I am seeing in my eye. But I try. One of the main things I have learned is that lighting is the number one thing (for me, because I don't know enough or have enough control of aperture and shutter speed) for me to take into consideration when shooting. If I have good light, I can shoot good pictures. I shoot still, inanimate objects better than moving objects or people due to the fact again that I have such a long shutter lag on my point and shoot. Someday I hope to get a digital SLR, but now can't justify the cost.

Now that was fun!!!! And it gave me something to post on this here blog that I have neglected so terribly lately. If you are interested in me interviewing you, leave me a comment to that affect and I will do my best to make you think as much as Becky has made me think.

What has been really going on...

Well, my last couple of posts have been vague and kind of filler because I have had some major changes going on in my life, but had to share it with family and friends before I could share it with the blog world.

The first thing has changed my life beyond anything that has ever happened in my life. On June 20th I committed my life to Christ and became a Christian. This has been a long journey. My husband became a Christian about 2 years into our marriage. He was not a Christian per se when we met, started dating or got married. I was raised for the most part Jewish, so needless to say, this has been a major change. Someday soon, I will share my full testimony, but at this time, there is so much to share and it is such a long story that I have to pare it down to share on here.

In other news...

So, what's new with you?

Pet Peeve of the Day

I had to make a trip to the mall today to buy some makeup and some other things. Our particular mall has 3 major escalators and 2 elevators, not to mention escalators within the department stores. As I pull up to the elevator with Boo Bear in the stroller, more and more people begin to pile up around the elevator. They crowd in front of the door. This drives me crazy anywhere because, duh, people have to get off when those doors open. But the part that drives me the most crazy is that over 75% of the people that get on the elevator with me are people who look to me like they can a) walk just fine b)are capable of using an escalator and c) are not in a position where they are forced to use the elevator(i.e. no wheelchair or stroller). I would happily use the escalator; it's faster, even if you have to walk a little bit farther, but you see, I CAN'T! I have this toddler in a stroller that as much as I might enjoy teetering along on the escalator, them escalator peoples frown on doing that. It's not safe, so you see I have to use the elevator.

So do me a favor, if you must use the elevator, you lazy bum, please stand back, allow the current occupants off in a polite fashion -- don't worry we will all get on, unless of course you are a jerk and take up all the room, so that mothers with strollers cannot get on. And politely holding the door so that a mother who, although she wishes she had 4 arms, doesn't, so it's easiest if someone helps hold the door so that it doesn't close on her. Thank you.

What gets your blood pressure up?

Under Construction

Page under construction, please pardon our lack of ability in blog design.

Because I lack anything profound to say...

Before I get to the good stuff, if anyone knows how to fix this here blog, let me know. The design was done by a company that is no longer in business and I can't get a hold of the designer. The images are stored who knows where. Any ideas?

Now to what you really want to see. I took Boo Bear to get pictures done for Father's Day. Here are some of the shots. Don't ever go to Picture People, that's all I'm gonna say about that.

My little cell phone hog.

Look at all those teeth!

Hanging at the Grill.

Patriotic

There you go, a little update with pictures. Boo Bear turns 1.5 this Sunday. Where has the time gone?

Where in the world have I been?

Apparently one person misses me! Thanks Leah for wondering!!!!

Where have I been? I have been living a very busy life lately, some of it very exciting, some of it draining, and some of it life-changing. (No, I am not pregnant.)

In as short form as I can, here are some bullet points from the last month. Wow, over a month since I last posted.

• Work, work, work and work.
• Helping to take care of my grandmother in NM.
• MIL two ruptured discs in neck. Very bad. No babysitter, also.
• Broken toilet, flooded bathroom, hallway and my closet. Still not fixed.
• Volunteered at Vacation Bible School. 4&5 year olds helped to teach me patience.
• Swim lessons with Boo Bear.
• July 4th, duh!

That is the basics. Of course there is more than just that, but life has been ticking along at a great pace and I am blessed every day.

Next week Boo Bear will turn a year and a half. Where does the time go? She is really starting to talk more and her vocabulary consists of saying everything twice. Bubbles, Bye-bye, cold, car, go, diaper, tada, baby, Mama, Dada, Pop, and a couple more I can't remember. She of course babbles along in her own little language.

The last couple of days we have been struggling to get her to eat anything other than bread or grapes or bananas. I realized that she was living off of carbs and fruit. So we are working on protein/meat and vegetables. Let's just say, it is a lesson once again in patience.

Boo Bear 4 Mom 1

Anyways, there is always more to write and more to do. I will try and write more often for you Leah and who ever else might still read this here blog.

It's been one of these days...

One of those days that leaves you spent. Leaves you longing for the life before... before kids... before marriage, when all you had to worry about was yourself. Feeding yourself, listening to yourself, doing what you wanted, when you wanted. I just thought I knew what multi-tasking was back then. Now multi-tasking has a whole new meaning. Like a circus freak of multi-tasking, I take on too much and let the side show take over.

When I am like this, Boo Bear feeds off it and then I feed off of her. She is almost a year and a half and still isn't talking much which leaves her major form of communication whining. I hate whining. She is also really beginning to test boundaries, although she has really been doing this since she could crawl and reach for things.

I am tired of saying no and no and no and don't and no and no again. I am tired of having to take things away and pull her down from places and I am tired of the screaming and the crying and the whining and rinse repeat all over again. I am tired of having to try and juggle working from home and keeping her occupied and moving her focus every 2 minutes while answering the phone and trying to cook dinner and keep a clean house and find time for work and faith and my husband and not to mention myself. Time for myself? What's that?

I wish I had more patience with my daughter because I know that the less patience I have, the more I yell and the more she screams and I hate being like this. My husband is so patient and good with her and she minds him completely different than she does me and I know that I am a large reason for this and I want to change, but not sure how to even begin other than praying, which I guess is a start.

Tell me I'm not the only one. Please!

ah, ah, ahhhhh CHOO!!!

It's been one of those weeks. Those letters strung together in the title sum it up. I have been recovering from a sinus infection, Boo Bear has had an ear infection, followed closely by a cold. And to put the cherry on the proverbial sundae of life, I have had two trips to the allergist this week to determine if I am, in fact, allergic to shellfish.

Monday at the allergist they tested me for environmentally allergies. If you have never had allergy testing, I don't recommend it. The test involves the undressing of the upper portion of your body. You lay down on the table and a nurse comes in with a tray full of little needles that have been marinating in allergens. She then proceeds to stab you in the back 50 or so times, give or take 5 or 6. Then you lay there for twenty minutes to see what kind of reaction you have. I immediatly started itching and when they checked me about halfway through the twenty minute time period, the nurse called out in the hall, "There are too many for me to memorize." Fabulous.

Wednesday I went back and not only did they retest me for everything that I was negative for on Monday, 46 or so, they tested me for the food allergies. Another 50 or so pokes. This time the retest for the environmental allergies wasn't quite as non-intrusive. This time, they stick that little marinated needle under your skin and scratch. Fun stuff. Like 50 little bitty shots. In your back. Once again, I reacted almost immediately and the nurse actually had to put Hydrocortisone cream on me midway, some of my spots were so bad. She comes back into check me at the end and is marking down on a scale how bad my reactions are. We had a couple, of negatives, not many though. We had a couple of, "As big as they can get," and a couple of "Not so bads." At one point the nurse said, "Well, at least you aren't allergic to chocolate." I responded, "I would rather have shellfish than chocolate." She thought I was crazy as I am sure many of you will. My family is big on seafood. Every celebration, birthday's, graduations, etc are always at a seafood restaurant. I have been eating shellfish my entire life. But no more. I am officially allergic to shrimp, lobster and crab. I didn't react to oysters or scallops or clams, but the doc warned me to be careful and the thought of having to stab myself in the leg with an Epi-Pen, well, it just isn't worth it.

When the nurse came in and handed me the list of all the things they tested me for with the things I am allergic to checked, I just sat there and laughed. It's all I could do. I am a walking allergy. Take a look. Behold the list of things I am allergic to:

Click it to big it.

Pretty funny isn't it? It's amazing that I don't get sick more often. He wants to put me on some daily meds as well as allergy shots. I am not sure what I want to do. I don't generally like taking medication on an ongoing basis and I certainly am not wild about shots. Anyone have any experience in this domain. Any alternative treatments you might recommend?

Dear Internet

It's been way too long since my last confession, I mean post. Life has been a little hectic, but isn't that always the case.

The past two weeks have been a roller coaster ride of mass proportions. The kind of ride that leaves you feeling spent and not quite sure you enjoyed it at all. The week before Mother's Day I got a call on Wednesday that my grandmother had fallen again. She was okay, didn't break anything, thanks to God, but her mental state was not good. She is still in a lot of pain from her hip replacement in October and the move to NM was hard on her. My sister said she was telling people good-bye, so Boo Bear and I hopped on a plane that day and went to see her. My grandmother has always been a major influence in my life, whether I realized it or not. As a child, I would visit her and my grandfather at their lake house in Austin. I loved that house. I felt safe and comfortable in that house. We would swim in the lake and go out on the boat and jump of the docks and fish. Grandpa and I would go dig in the garden for worms and then head down the 100 steps to the dock. I would bait my hook and drop it in the water and when I caught the fish, grandpa would take it off the hook for me. I didn't like touching the fish, so grandpa always had to do that part, but I could bait that hook!

As I got older, I would take trips with them to Ghost Ranch. This was the closest I ever got to going to sleep away camp. I had my first major crush here. He was the son of the owners and everyone knew him. His name was Josh and boy was he cute. The two or three summers I went with my grandparents and once or twice with my Mom, were some of the best summer memories I have. I got hit in the nose with a soft ball here. I discovered pizza with pineapple on it here. I drank my first beer here. Good times.

Grandpa passed away my senior year in high school and I still cry every time I think about him. I learned to eat my eggs with ketchup from my grandpa and of course how to bait a hook. I miss him terribly still and I wish he could have met his great grandkids. The would have loved him.

If it wasn't for Grandma, I probably would have never finished college. At times I worked 3 jobs and went to school full time. I lived with Grandma a couple of times throughout my 6 year tenure at UT and didn't visit nearly enough when I wasn't living there. But it was the monthly allowance she started giving me so that I didn't have to work so much that saved me. When she fell in October, I went to care for her for a week. This was very difficult for me, seeing her bedridden. Harder still was moving her to NM, packing up her house and closing the doors for the last time. Hubby and I were the last people to in our family to be in that house and I cried and cried as we left. Never again to be in that house with my grandparents was very hard.

Seeing her last week was hard. She doesn't want to live anymore, but she is healthy as a horse so it looks like she is going to stick around for awhile longer, God willing. It was very hard to say good-bye not knowing if it would be the last time I saw her, but I'm so thankful that I was able to go when I did and at least know that if she goes soon, I saw her one last time.

We got back home at 9:30 PM on Mother's Day, not exactly a stellar day. Boo Bear did great on the flights and I am so glad that I had understanding people next to me both trips. We both came home sick, her with an ear infection and me with a sinus infection. So throw in trips to two doctors, a bad reaction to the medicine they gave me, on top of catching up at work and last week was a bundle of fun. Definitely the part of the roller coaster where your stomach drops.

Other updates in the form of one long run on sentence basically.

Boo Bear turned 16 months last week. My baby really isn't a baby anymore, but a little girl. This week her Nana B is here visiting so once again, we are busy with family, which is wonderful. Hubby I think has finally found a reliable manager which means that he actually gets two days off a week, one of which we actually get to spend together as a family.

With that long post, I will leave you with this.

A Girl and Her Gorilla. Yes, that is an eyeball in the background.

The End

No, not of me or this blog, although with my lack of posting you might think so. And fairly enough. I am currently watching the Series finale of Gilmore Girls. Bummer, deep down, sad bummer.

Much has been going on, very busy with life. Will post something real soon. When I stop blowing my nose to death.

Things I never thought I would do...

In my early twenties I was cool. Or at least I thought I was. I thought I would never give up the all nighters. I would never ease up on my lead foot, I would never do this or that or the other...

There are always things we think we will never do.

Things like...

I never thought I would like watching the Food Network, until I became a Mom and started cooking every night. Okay, almost every night.
Speaking of...I never thought I would cook dinner every night.
I never thought my husband would call me a good cook. (Or anyone call me a good cook for that matter.)
I never thought I would ever think a child leash would be a good idea, until I had a baby who never stops moving and refuses to hold my hand.
I never thought I would use a pacifier, until I had a sucker of a baby.
I never thought that playing with my daughter would be better than a night on the town.
I never thought that I would drive below the speed limit, just to be safe. (Okay, maybe not below the speed limit, but at the speed limit is pretty good. )
I never thought that being able to go grocery shopping by myself would be considered a break from the grind.
I never thought that a gir's night out might be more trouble than just staying home with my family.
I never thought that I would share my thoughts, ideas and everything else with the world.

What did you never think you would do when you were young?

ModMommy Giveaways

ModMom is sharing the linky love with all the blogger moms out there for mother's day as well as giving away some fun stuff. So if you want to take part, check out her site for more information. If you want linky love you will need to create a banner or button that represents your blog and send it to her with the link to your blog. Let me know if you need help with that part. I am no design diva, but I dabble. And take part in all her giveaways, there's some neat stuff.

MIA... the ongoing edition

I started this post two weeks ago. Sorry I'm such a schlump.

Man, it has been awhile since I was here. Last week (beginning of April) brought trips to Shreveport and Las Vegas and this week brings trips to Corpus Christi and back and 24 hours. I'm beat. Throw in normal everyday life, work and homeowners board duties and I'm plum worn out. We of course had Easter, Boo Bear's first Easter as an active participant. She probably would have been happy with one egg as she carried that one, first found egg around most of the day and was really more happy taking eggs out of her basket rather than putting them in. We had fun though.

See:

Yesterday, (two weeks ago now)we took Boo Bear for her first hair cut. I was a little worried about the whole thing. Not so much about how she would do, but more about how I would do and how I felt about the whole cutting of the hair. My baby's hair. As my step mom said, it's so hard, because we love every single little bitty hair on their heads. And we grew that hair. I did okay, she did wonderfully and we had our first haircut done in under 10 minutes. She did not fuss or squirm a bit. I think she looks much older now and is really no longer my little baby, more my little girl. She also looks more like her father again. Almost just like him at this same age, except he didn't have the pigtails.

Sorry that is all I have for now, but I am still catching up from last week and have a play date today, so off for now. Hope you are all doing well and I hope to catch up soon!

Update on the completely lame update: Just been busy here with normal, everyday life. Projects and such, but hopefully soon I can return to blogging on a normal basis.

I should really post something already

Yeah, I should, but I ain't got nothing good to say and you know how the saying goes...

Been busy with work and some play and homeowners board duties and The Sick. Yes, The Sick came to visit us a month ago and seems to like it around here. It started with Boo Bear's ear infection and then I got strep throat and now she has Roseola in full force, complete with fever and rash, oh goodness the rash. She is covered from head to toe now with these little red dots and I thank God that they do not itch and they don't bother her. The fever isn't so bad although it worries me. Am I the only one who thinks that only treating a fever over 101 and only being concerned if the fever is over 104 is CRAZY!!!! My child rarely runs fever unless she is teething (which is what she was doing until The Rash showed up) so a fever over 100 concerns me. I know I'm a first time parent and all and I probably won't be such a worrier with the next one, but I hate calling the doctor's office and having them tell me to just give her Tylenol if her fever is over 101.

This Rowdy Roseola Rash is thankfully not bothering Boo Bear at all, but is putting a major kink in my very busy schedule this week. I had to cancel a work meeting today due to the lovely Ms. Rash. We are supposed to go out of town this weekend for my grandmother's 89th birthday, but if Boo Bear still has rash, it's a no go. Nana won't be around forever and I don't get to see her that often so I really wanted to go. I also have a work trip to Vegas next Wednesday that I will be pretty stuck if she isn't better by then. The doc says because it's viral, who knows how long it could take to go away. That's helpful. So I will sit here and pray that the Rowdy Rash goes down the drain soon.

See, told you I should have kept it all to myself.

So, what's new with you?

She's just like her father...

I brought the dust buster out yesterday to clean up the dirt that went everywhere when Boo Bear picked up the rug that sits in front of the kitchen sink to wear as a hat. I proceeded to have to play keep away from her to get the mess cleaned up and then I gave her the dust buster to play with, after I turned it off. I walked into the living to check in on work email and was sitting there responding to an email when Boo Bear walks in and hands me the filter for the dust buster. She had the filter in one hand and a handful of dirt and dust in the other. She had taken the thing apart. Just like her father.

Month 14

Dear Boo Bear:

You turned 14 months old today and are growing and learning so many new things everyday. First off, I still call you Boo Bear here most of the time, but in reality we call you Boo Ba mostly. I don't know how, but it stuck. Sorry kid, at least it isn't Shooter like your father calls me or Bean which is what my parents called me.

We have been having a rough couple of weeks. You got your first ear infections (both ears) last week. I knew you were sick because you let me hold you all day which you will normally only tolerate for about 30 seconds unless its really your choice, like when I'm in the middle of cooking dinner. You have handled being sick so well and I am so blessed with your temperment. I have also been blessed this week with my first bout of strep throat since about 1995. Fun stuff. Needless to say, our patience levels on both sides have been waning.

You are never without something in both of your hands. You like to walk around with say a toy in one hand and my deoderant in the other. Or my bra in one hand and myy underwear in the other. (No comments about my unders laying around)You are in constant motion, always from one place to the next, stopping only to pick something up or put something down.

You have started saying some "words" lately. Your favorite of course corresponding with your favorite food, bananas. You will sit under the counter where we keep the bananas and say "na, na" or will hold out while you are eating something else, hoping that if you don't eat what is set before you, I will give you a banana. I had to withhold them for a couple of days because you were getting so no matter what I fed you, you would refuse to eat it and sit your high chair saying, "na" over and over.

You have finally started saying bye bye, but only after the person has already left the room or your site. It's more close to "ba ba", but none the less, it's a farewell. You have continued to use "Gah" for all things animal, especially cats, but also for all other animals. You have started saying "baa" for bird though, I think. You have also started stringing the sound "ca" together over and over, "cacacacacaca". That's a lot of caca.

My favorite thing you say right now though has got to be when I ask you what the cow says and you say, "maaooo."

Melts my heart that right there. Of course, that is also what the cat says and the dog says and the pig and so on, but that's okay, it's so darn cute.

You are great at playing by yourself most of the time and will pull toys out of your toybox and bring them to me to show me. You love to open up books, put something inside them and then close the book on whatever it is you have shoved in there.

You have a newfound love for closing doors as well, along with cabinets and drawers. I encourage this most of the time, except for when you go into the dark laundry room and close me out. That big iron coat rack would hurt if it fell on you. You don't seem to mind the dark or the aloneness though and will promplty run to the other side of the room after you close the door.

You are really beginning to understand more lately. Yesterday I told you to go get your cup off the chair in the kitchen and you walked right over there and did it. I just kind of sat there with my mouth hanging open. I know you understand more than you let on too, you little stinker.

Lately one of my biggest patience drainers has been this scream you like to do. It's to get my attention it seems like, but you do it a lot when I am changing your diaper. It's a short, very loud, agh and you do it repeatedly, wearing me out completely. I have tried telling you "no" in a stern voice. I have tried telling you quiet voice while showing you what a quiet voice is. I have tried giving you a little pop on your butt and even (no so proud of this one) squeezing your cheeks. I have also tried the ignore it approach and in the car, the turn up the radio really loud approach. Nothing works. I know consistency is key, so I am really working on the quiet voice approach, but girl you are killing me with the screaming, especially right now with my aching head and 100 degree fever. I try to realize that you are having trouble communicating your needs and wants right now, but let's work on something else, please.

You are growing so fast and I can't believe we've come so far so fast. To think a year and a half ago, you were just a bump in my belly, an imagined dream and now you are so real. Your smile, with your 7-8 teeth is so cute, cashiers everywhere comment on it. At least now I know I'm not totally biased. Your laugh is the best sound in the world and I wish I could hear it more. You love to watch your daddy kick things around the room. This never fails to get a laugh out of you. You also love to jump around on the bed and will wear yourself out going from one side of our bed to the other, climbing over pillows and plopping yourself down face first.

I am so torn between work and being a mom and a wife and I feel like I don't always give you the best that I can. I'm sorry baby, I will always try to do better. Please forgive me for the times that I'm a bad mommy. Know that I love you very much and will do anything for you.

Love,
Mama

Announcing...Announce The Bump

The project? The super secret, but not really, project. It's ready to be revealed. I have started a new Cafepress store called announce the bump that features products for announcing that you are expecting. There are sections for Moms To Be, Duds for Dad, Kids Korner and Fabulous Family. I have also started a blog to share announcement stories, announce the bump blog. So go on over and check them out. Both are linked over on the side bar there, go on, you know you want to, and check it out. I would love to hear your feedback and thoughts on the store and the blog. Send me an email at shootersstation (@) gmail (dot) com (you know the drill, no parentheses, no spaces) with your thoughts on the two new sites. If you want to share your announcement story and pictures, send those to me at announcethebump (@) gmail (dot) com.

There, the secret is out. I am very excited about this new shop and I even sold something before I started promoting it anywhere. Please share with friends and family who might be interested and thanks for your support!

today was as good a day as any

Boo Bear has gotten her first ear infection. Both ears in fact. I knew something wasn't right by the constant screaming, but I really knew she wasn't well when she let me hold her for longer than 30 seconds. In fact, I think I held her for about 5 hours today. Poor thing would only sleep on my chest in the rocker or on the couch. My poor baby. I know, I know, almost 14 months and this is really the first time she has been sick. Go ahead and say it, lucky dog. But still, it sucks to see my baby in pain and suffering.

News of the project coming really soon, I promise.

this ain't my first rodeo

But it was Boo Bear's. We took Boo Bear to the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo yesterday. She unfortunately didn't take a real good nap in the morning and didn't get her afternoon one at all so I was a little worried on how she would do. Luckily there were plenty of sights, sounds and people to keep her attention.

My little cowgirl.

Kicking up her heels.

Everybody needs a pair of pink cowgirl boots!

She stayed awake all night, but this was her two minutes after we got into the car. We didn't even get out of the parking spot hardly before she crashed. We had fun. We really didn't get to do the carnival at all, but we did get to see some of the animals which she loved and we got to eat some good carnival food and we saw the end of the rodeo and the calf scramble. Los Lonely Boys were playing and we were excited to see them. Unfortunately, whether it was their bad sound check or something else. The first song was so loud that you couldn't even understand the words. By the second song, I took Boo Bear out of the seating area and put us behind a wall so it wasn't so loud. Needless to say, we were there for about 4-5 songs before we left. That was okay though, it was a fun night with my MIL and hubby and baby. We got home about 10:30 as it was, so we probably left at a perfect time.

Yeehaw!